Who says words don’t matter?

I am tired. I am grumpy. I am angry. I am frustrated, fed-up, let-down, irate, and disgruntled.

When I say, “I am” and then add a descriptor after it, it is almost as if I asscribe that emotion permanently to myself. “I am frustrated” means that part of me will always be frustrated. Frustration becomes a permanent state. Like a stamp, marking me as such.  Obviously, overcoming frustration becomes much more difficult if I say, “I am frustrated.”

What if, instead, I say, “I feel frustrated.” No longer have I linked my identity with my emotion. When I feel something, I immediately acknowledge that the feeling will pass. I feel angry. Well, tomorrow I will probably not feel angry. There is a transience to feeling. I may feel differently in five minutes, but I am who I am until I die.

Just replacing “I am” with “I feel” when expressing negative emtions has helepd me to let go of those emotions more quickly.

I AM intrigued by the power of words!

This entry was posted in A Sustainable Life, Education, Pearls of Wisdom. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Who says words don’t matter?

  1. Bo Adams says:

    Peyten, I agree! I feel frustrated when I hear the phrase, “I am ADD,” or “he/she is ADD.” I much prefer, “I have ADD.” Thanks for this post.

  2. Flip Hager says:

    Similarly, I feel frustrated when people use the word ‘feel’ instead of ‘believe’ when they take a position on an issue or when they are making a statement about what they think. “I feel like you should go on that trip” comes off much better if you instead say, “I believe you should go on that trip.”

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